A Future Without Fear: Forgotten Commitments
by knownbeforetime
Summary: Is Rachel alive or dead? Is it both! See how a forgotten commitment saves Rachel's life but it's not what you would expect!
1. Default Chapter

Forgotten Commitments

  
  
  


A/N: Again, I have not read the last four books, although I have gotten some spoilers from other fics. I do not know if they are true, but I'll use them anyway! Also, this is what I believe what happens when you die. (I might have stretched some parts a little to fit in with the story and things I don't really know about. *I'm burning* :) ) This story is an attempt to keep me from becoming homicidal against Miss Applegate. (Who goes by K. A.?)

  


Rachel

  


The Ellimist told me his story and left. He left me for dead. I tell you what, he is a stupid-so-called-non-interfering-bastard! He's tricked us. He's betrayed us. Worst of all, he used us. I am dead because it didn't suit his purpose to keep me alive. Who said we had to rescue the Iskroot? They were cousins to the Yeerks for goodness sake! He wasn't someone with any authority that's for sure. Just because he had a good light show we assumed we had to help him.

Oh, Lord. That was so long ago, it seemed. It used to be so simple to sneak away in the middle of the night to fight. We would go down to the pool. I know I liked it too much at times. Sometimes, liking it made the real horror go away. It got so much more complicated when I had to tell my mom. It was downright painful to drag my family into the forest and into this mess. We were dragged out of house and home into the woods. Even there we weren't really safe.

I remember the special moments with Tobias. I remember our one kiss. It was my first. I'm sure it was his. I had kind of laughed about it later. It was kind of awkward because I didn't know how to go about it. In the end I just went for it, knowing that he needed it. Maybe, I needed it too, because it felt so right. I never told him how much I cared for him. Sure, it was implied. We knew we loved each other, but we never came out and said, "I love you." I would give anything to see his beautiful face once more.

Wait a minute. I'm supposed to be dead! I can't be dead, I'm still thinking! Maybe the Ellimist decided to help me after all. Maybe, I'm still alive! I vaguely remembered where I was, and discovered I wasn't there anymore. I noticed I was sitting up with my knees drawn to my chest. My arms were clasped around them, and my head was nestled in the little hole it made. I opened my eyes, mainly because I realized I could, and looked around.

Suddenly, I realized the pain was gone. There were no blood or guts. I was in one piece. I saw I was in a room. This room had the whitest walls I had ever seen. I looked down and saw that I wasn't wearing my morphing outfit, but was clothed in a white dress. This dress fit beautifully, it fit into every corner of my body. Like the walls, this dress was incredibly white. It stopped right at my ankles. I was feeling around my body for any wounds and didn't find any. However, when I got to my stomach, I felt I had no belly button! I also noticed I was taller, stronger, and older. I felt 25!

As I became more aware of my surroundings, I noticed that one wall wasn't really a wall! There was a light source pouring with light and made the illusion of a wall. I looked toward the light source and instantly forgot why I was scared and angry. Well, I didn't exactly forget what happened. I just forgot why it made me so scared and angry. I looked toward it and was drawn into its source. I just started walking.

I was so light on my feet, I felt like I was gliding through the air. I didn't even know if there was a walkway under my feet. It seemed when I looked into the source I felt more sure of my steps. I was gradually slanting upwards along what seemed a very straight narrow path. In what seemed like minutes, I found the source.

You can't even imagine what He looked like! He was pure light, yet pure human. He knew the deepest human sorrows and yet He was so above it. His face wasn't remarkable, but you couldn't ignore it. His face was pure love and righteousness.

_Do you know who I am? _He asked. He had that strange telepathic ability. It was as if He was speaking to my soul and not to me.

I scrambled through my mind of possible explanations. There was only one conclusion to be made. Nobody on Earth would believe me if I told them!

"Are you God?" I asked in my normal human voice. I instantly felt humbled. I was on my knees in a second. My voice was barely audible through the ringing of his previous question.

_Yes._ He said. I was immediately prostrate on the ground. (I realized I was on ground not a floor.) I realized that the Ellimist didn't save me after all. I was dead, for sure.

_Do you know what you are about to go through?_ He asked

"No." I squeaked.

_You are about to be judged. In fact, this is part of it. Do you know what you have to do to have a guaranteed place in heaven?_

I struggled to think. I didn't do anything worth getting into heaven that's for sure. Maybe I helped save the world, but I did so much damage along the way. I was so ruthless. Even before I became an Animorph, I wasn't the best person. I've hardly ever so much as looked at the Bible in my lifetime. Wait a minute! What happens if I don't get in here? If I don't go to heaven, then I go to hell! 

I started crying, "Please, let me in here! I can't go into hell!" I was sobbing. My tears were different though. They were icy cold and reminded me of Earth that was so far away.

_Hush, hush. Your judgement isn't over yet._ Wait a minute, maybe He was insinuating something.

_This is what has to happen before you can go to heaven. First you need to know why it is so hard to come here. That is because 'all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God'. That is Romans 3:23. If you sinned even once, you are doomed to hell._

I let that sink in a bit. Was this another Ellimist trick? I was doomed.

_But 'for God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son that whosoever believeth in him shall not perish but have everlasting life.' That is John 3:16. Last but not least, Romans 10:13, For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved. Now, you see? Everyone sins. I had to send my son to die on a cross, a most painful and embarrassing death to buy you back from those sins. He carried our sins on the cross to pay for them. But since I created free will, I could not be sure that everybody would take this gift. That is why you have to choose for yourself if you want to come here . . . while you are alive. There you have it. If you called upon my name and acknowledged your sins and received my spirit, while you were alive, you are granted access._

My face went as white as my dress. I don't remember calling on the name of the Lord. If I had known, I would have taken the offer in an instant. Well, maybe. Would I have believed such a claim? Would I believe I was going to hell, when it wasn't so apparent as right now? I was busy with the Animorphs. I was trying to save the world. I dealt with Life and Death every day from that trip in the construction site. I could have cared less about heaven and hell. But, all have sinned . . . he said. Nothing I said would cut it.

He mentioned free will. I remember the mission with the Yeerk experiment to take away free will for more voluntary controllers. The guy couldn't do it. Everything he tried failed. I realized that this was the key - choice. God created free will, and loved us so much that he couldn't take it away. After hearing that, I realized that this was an amazing, awesome God! He loved us so much to sacrifice his son. His sacrifice was so much more than mine. It was more than Jake, my cousin, ordering me to my death, which probably wouldn't mean much in saving people. It was a father telling his only son to die to save the world. So what if the Animorphs win the war! Billions of people would probably be doomed to hell, even if they _were _free from the Yeerks.

I could see this playing out in my head: The night before the crucifixion, Jesus Christ was so scared, he was thinking of backing out. He didn't. His best friend betrayed him to the authorities. It kind of reminded me of my own story, but I didn't come near as close to saving the world than he did. It doesn't end there! When He died, He went down to hell, because He carried our sins with him. The fix was he had to get out. He did. 3 days he was dead and then he woke up. He conquered death, and so becomes our savior! Imagine! All we have to do is ask! 

Now I see this and think how awesome, but it doesn't help that I know now. I should have known back then . . . 

Ultimately, my fate came down to did I make a simple choice.

  


To be continued . . .

  


A/N: A nifty little cliffhanger. . . Just letting you know, It's not over yet!


	2. Unconditional Commitments

**Forgotten Commitments**

**Chapter 2**

**Unconditional Commitments**

Rachel

_Now think! Did you ever make such a commitment?_

I was on the ground, but soon stood up. That was how amazing he was, he gave me his hand and stood me up. He wiped my tears off, but now He had a sad look in his eyes.

I started to answer his question but I was shaken off guard by the movement of the ground. The six-inch space between God and I expanded to about a five-by-five foot space. I felt separated from him already. It turned black and snowy. It was like a television screen! 

I stared at this a few minutes until I heard something. I couldn't make sense of it at first, but I saw the horror. It was heavy breathing! We were going through all the moments of my life - starting from conception! I was not prepared for that! It played out in real time. Every single horrible thing I had done was played before God, and I was totally ashamed. But there was one moment. I had forgotten everything about this particular month in my life. . .

This month was June, in between elementary school and middle. It was a year or two before I became an Animorph. I struggled to recall it in my own mind, but it was recited in crystal clear precision on the screen. This is what is so remarkable about June. When I lived in my house on Earth, there was a Baptist church about a mile away. Now, as my mom took me to Cassie's house, we would pass by it. One year, I particularly noticed a sign in front of this church. It said: Vacation Bible School - June 1st through 5th - 9 to Noon - Parent Night on June 6th at 7:00 - Refreshments served all week! 

Needless to say, I hadn't been to one of these before. I don't know why. They were all over town this time of year. I think it had to do with that my mom didn't think a Christian church would like a Jewish girl. (My dad was Jewish. *) I kept harassing my mom about it until she let me go. The next day I went.

I was amazed at how many kids I knew were there. I had kind of thought that they would be wierdo nerds but no. It was so much fun. We sang, ate, and learned. The concepts were entirely foreign. I had never heard of Jesus Christ, or what Christmas and Easter was really about. So, the last day came and I was feeling a little sad. I didn't want it to end!

We did our singing and eating for the day and just as we were about to leave, my teacher for the week fetched me out of the crowd.

"You look a little sad. What's wrong?"

"I don't want to go."

"Well, your coming tomorrow, right?"

"Yes."

"Well, how about Sunday. You're welcome here every Sunday!"

"Really!" Wow! I loved these people! They were very welcoming and nice. Then I became sad again. "You seem different from my mom and dad. They just got divorced. They weren't nice at all for a while."

"Oh," my teacher said. "I went through that same thing when I was your age. I came to a church such as this and you know what they told me?"

"What?"

"They told me that no one is perfect, not even our best friends. I could still trust them and love them, but they would come to a point and fail. But! You know who is perfect! Jesus! He will never fail you and will always be your friend."

"How can I get him to be my friend?"

"It's simple. You have to pray. Just like we have been talking about all week. We all sin, but once we ask for forgiveness, he is always on our side! This commitment is unconditional. Which means that once we have him in our hearts, he will never leave! Do you want to try it?"

I was so amazed. I HAD to try it. I wanted a friend who understood, understood even more than Cassie. My Mom and Dad loved me, but God's love was perfect. It was not blemished by divorce or separation. So, of course, I did it. I prayed.

Dear Jesus,

I have sinned. I am so sorry. I didn't want to hurt you. I realize you will save me from my sin and be my friend and lord and savior forever. Please come into my heart and guide me day by day.

Amen.

For the next month, I went to this church. I loved it. My second Sunday there, I was told I would need to be baptized. They did this the first Sunday of every month. I told them I would be there. I now had to get my mother to come. 

Getting her to come was an ordeal. She had an excuse for every week. "I have to take care of Sara!" (Who was only two.) "I have work to do for court tomorrow." I hated that one because the next day she stayed home and played with Sara. "I have to meet with a client." "I didn't get enough sleep last night! You wouldn't want me falling asleep in church. That would be embarrassing." I should have responded, "It's EMBARRASSING to have you absent every Sunday." But I didn't say that. I had to honor my mother, the fifth commandment.

Anyway, the Thursday before I am to be baptized, my mother drops a bombshell. "We're going to your grandmother's. We're leaving Saturday and coming back Monday. It's her birthday."

I screamed. "MOM! I'm supposed to be baptized on Sunday!"

"Oh, well. You'll have to reschedule."

"But Mom, I wanted you to be there!"

"Well, I'm sorry. I've never missed my mother's birthday and I'm not going to start because you want to go swimming in the kiddie pool in this church of yours."

What could I do? I ran up the stairs screaming. It made Sara scream as well, which made my mother very angry and just added fuel to the fire. So, Saturday afternoon, I was firmly buckled in the backseat of my mother's car beside Sara. Jordan got to sit in front this time. I wonder why. We got to our grandmother's house in time, where my mother and her mother laughed about my antics over a cup of coffee.

I was so hurt. I decided I couldn't face the people at church. I was too embarrassed to go after blowing off my baptism. I got over it in time. I decided that I would never be embarrassed, or scared of anything ever again. I guess it came in handy when I became an Animorph. Maybe, a little too handy.

After that, there were so many times I said curse words, said No to my parents, the times I lied, and stole, the times I was cruel and selfish, even the times I killed. . . However, the commitment was unconditional, and I was told to go to the right.

_You made a commitment to me a long time ago, but it still holds. You may go to the right. But first, look to the left. You'll notice something familiar in it. Okay, now go to the right and DON'T look back! Also, don't worry about your friends. Whether they make it here or not has nothing to do with you. Another thing, by NO means think of yourself as dead!_

I looked to the left. It reminded me of the Yeerk pool. In fact, it looked EXACTLY the same! There was a small hole, just the size of an average person. I saw a few people walking towards it. I could hear the screams of the burning souls who had never made a commitment to God. The demons were doing their work, just as the Yeerks were doing on Earth. Then, I looked to the right. Light was pouring into and the opening was huge! You could fit twenty people across it. This is where I was told to go and I went.

I made my way to the right. This is the most glorious moment of my life! I said life, for that is what this is. It is even more than life on Earth because you can not experience life unless you have an experience with the one who created life.

This was the only place where I could experience real peace. I wouldn't have to be fearless or ruthless. I wouldn't have to kill or steal. I didn't even have to eat or sleep. The righteousness of God was enough to sustain us! Here I didn't have to deal with all the human trash that started with the first sin of Adam. I wouldn't have to worry about school or a career. Our only job was to love God. I would never be hurt or broken. Especially here, there was no war. . .

A/N: Next chapter, coming sometime in the current century. . .


End file.
